I'm tired of dating apps. How can I meet potential partners in real life?

I remember when I tried online dating a long time ago, today's apps weren't available yet. I think it was sometime around 2007 and I used Yahoo personals, plenty of fish, and geek2geek to try to find a boyfriend. Though I did end up dating a couple of guys, I remember feeling like the whole process of browsing pictures and looking at people's profiles felt cheap, disposable, and like a "meat market".

Later, they came up with Tinder, and the whole swipe right/swipe left thing started. I've never used Tinder, but I keep imagining a scenario in which a person would swipe left on the love of their life just because their picture wasn't flattering enough. What a missed opportunity! It makes my heart ache.

Having said all that, I completely understand why you're tired of dating apps. I would be tired too if I were you!

I know some folks do find luck on the apps but sometimes it feels like a lottery! What I like about the prospect of you meeting someone in person instead of an app is that you'd feel the person's energy immediately, and you'd be able to sense whether there is a vibe between you right away. We can't feel vibes and energy through a tiny screen.

Here are some ideas for you to meet someone in person:

1. Join a group for an activity you enjoy doing: hiking, tennis, running, biking, board games, trivia, Spanish conversation, book club, cooking class, volunteering, etc. I used to host a Spanish group in the Chicago suburbs. I can tell you that group has put together at least 4 couples who are still in committed relationships today (so naturally, I'm taking the credit for those matches! :).

2. Sign up for a series of classes to learn a new skill: make sure there are multiple sessions, and it would be great if the class has other students of the gender you're interested in. (So, if you're looking to date a woman, you might not want to sign up for MMA Wrestling). May I suggest Salsa dancing? Or Swing dancing? Or Pickleball? The reason I am recommending a series of classes rather than just a standalone class is because in real life, repeated exposure helps break the ice, and helps us get to know people in a low pressure environment.

3. Ask friends to set you up with someone they think may be a good match for you: I know, this may be uncomfortable. But in this scenario, I'm imagining your well-meaning friends wanting you to find love and live your best life. If you stay open minded, who knows? Maybe they'll match you with someone good. What's there to lose?

4. Attend professional conferences that are relevant to your work or business: Bonus points if the conference is out of town. You might meet another professional from your field who is also single. You'll already have something in common: the conference! All you need to do is ask her if she'd like to have a drink ad the hotel bar. The rest will hopefully be history.

5. Talk to people at the coffee shop or at the grocery store: learn to make small talk that can lead to a more involved conversation if the other person is open to it. "It's hot out there today, right? (person responds in a friendly manner) Do you come here often?"

6. Attend singles events: I'm not sure if you've tried those before? If not, they might be worth a try. I've been told a lot of singles events have a higher attendance of women than men, so that might be something to keep in mind. Part of Filled Cups's mission is to get people together in real life. In the future, we will organize intelligent matchmaking events that use a proprietary matching protocol. I can't wait to make those happen and to claim credit for even more successful matches!

Anyway, I hope you are able to try a few of these ideas and put yourself out there in real life more often. Let me know if you find someone.